Daddy, Doctor, & The Talk.

 Zahir's Papa and I shared a doctor's visit Sunday. His wife and Zahir were asked not to come for the same reason. They put our hearts in irregular rhythms.
 

There are times I expect a juice box!

 The oldest brother (I'll call him OB) drove us. OB is wicked old, he has to be in his mid fifties. Z made sure I had money in my wallet. Then put me in the middle of the back seat, and belted me in. Then he told me to behave for OB and Papa. I felt like I was six, until I saw how OB helped his dad into the passenger seat.

 This is one of those days I am truly grateful I have a penis. For the most part, Muslim men are raised to be tight lipped and stoic, especially in front of their mate. Get a couple alpha males away from the group it is a riot. They share Zahir's laugh it made me smile. OB saw my smile and switched to English, "Papa is not fair we leave little Chase out of our fun. We say is Zahir's fault he stresses you too much. He should let you have more fun."

 I politely told him Zahir knows what is best for me, and I have plenty of fun. No one has the right to chastise or rebuke how MY Z cares for me. OB and Papa smiled and started talking about properties we need to see. I texted Zahir, "I miss you already 'Amali.'" I started calling him Amali, it means "My hope" in Arabic. I posted before Z doesn't like it when I call him Daddy, he knows how someone abused that title.

Zahir texted back, "The first time I saw you, the still voice whispered to my heart: 'That is the one for you.' Be good, My heart.”
  
**** 
 
 Zahir's father had a heart attack last year shortly after we arrived. I spent a good deal of time helping Z's mom care for him. She learned I was worthless in the kitchen for anything other than chopping. I did make a good go-fer, laundry boy, and walking partner when that time came. He recovered well, but now he's in the care and maintenance stage.

  Both of us started our day with fasting blood draws. The doctor met with both of us to review our vitals. Then he chastised me for losing weight. "When I reduce someone's exercise they normally put on weight." when he pushed up my shirt to listen to my heart he continued, "Tsk, these should not be so visible." OB and his dad had disapproving looks at my exposed ribs. "Your heart sounds good, a little slow but good."

 They came for his father and wheeled him away. OB was sitting alone with me in the room. He took that time to have a... no "The Talk." OB has a different accent from his brother in English and it isn't as polished. Zahir went to school in Chicago and has a very Midwestern accent. Both men share a low rumble undertone as they speak. I don't know how else to describe it. It has to be a Bedouin thing.

  "We are not blind boy. When you were on what we thought was your deathbed, you kept trying to comfort him. All could see the passion you share for him. Still, you behave right in public. Your presence to him has brought him back to us. You give him comfort and peace." 

 He went on for some time, discussing Zahir's first wife seeking and winning khula (divorce). He said it drove a wedge between Zahir and his family (since they picked her), worst still it weakened the practice of his faith. 

 He went on to talk about the other boys and how they shamed Zahir and the family. He told me things that I needed to do to keep his brother happy, in great detail. I new something was wrong with my heart, I could feel it breaking as I learned what Z sacrificed for me. The whole conversation felt very inappropriate, and made me feel like shit. 

 Then it was my turn it took 15 minutes for my heartbeat to level out from my talk with OB. A standard stress test had been ordered. It turns out the scorpion sting in April was a little prick, pun intended. On the one hand the anti-venom save my life, on the other hand it hurt my heart. It put me in severe tachycardia and the pressure against the surrounding swollen tissue bruised my heart. I am good now, and like Z's Dad in care and maintenance.

 The doctor was not impressed with my choice of dinner yesterday. He wagged his finger, "Hot dogs, too much sodium!" Zahir's father promise to speak with his son. No sooner had we gotten out of the doctor's office when he recommended we go have a dog, OB tried to shoot it down. My stomach rumbled, OB backed down when is father said something angrily. 
 
 We stopped at a Wazzup Dog franchise I had not been to. OB ordered for all of us. Three dogs all the way. That means something different here. Start with a fresh roll with a grilled beef hot dog on it. Add ketchup (yuck), mustard, mayonnaise (meh), tomatoes, onions, lettuce, and top that with crunchy chips, sweet corn (don't knock it till you try it), and a few jalapenos. I think our cardiologist would have had a heart attack if he saw the melted cheese being poured over it. 

 I thanked OB, prayed silently and dove in. I finished my dog and politely asked for a second bottle of water. The stress test left me very dehydrated. OB handed me his. He saw the look of guilt flash on my face. He told me he should have planned ahead, "I knew you were going to sweat."

 The doctor changed his scripts and we drove across Airport Road to the Pharmacy One. Then we picked up his wife. I slid over and gave her her seat. OB gave her a report on the both of us. Then she gave me a nose rub. "I keep saying, you are too thin." Suddenly, I realized what the doctor and the men had been talking about in Arabic. I really do have to learn this language.

I want Z to grow fur on his face...

 We drove to the office and Zahir received OB's report. There are times the family treats me like a kid, and there are times like this, when I feel more like a pet. I could tell OB did not tell him about the talk we had. Z said I smelled of hospital soap. I told him I forgot to pack my own and had to use the medicated hospital crap.

 Zahir and OB took their parents and I to see a couple adjoined villas one on the sea side. The men were admiring the golf course and marina. Z's mom's eyes met mine and both of us shook our heads no, not that anyone noticed. 

 As we toured the model home 'that was perfect for us,' his brother and parents were next door. Zahir asked, "What troubles you." I thought he was talking about the property. 

   I told him my view on cultivated (reclaimed) land, "That which you take from nature, it often takes back violently." He told me these were not in the running. Then he repeated his question. "I can see your heart is sore." I told him about the conversation with his brother and pleaded for him NOT to get angry.

 He explained it was wrong for his brother to speak to me like that. "OB is mired in the past..." Then said, "He has three wives and two ex-wives. I have had a longer relationship with Aya (his falcon) than OB had with his first wife, not the best source for advice on relationships." 

 I added I knew he turned down a position to give me the opportunity in engineering. "I have an obligation to see you grow. I will be held accountable if I fail you. You are MY boy." I think this is the first time I actually understood what being HIS boy meant to him.

 We looked at two more villas. I could tell Zahir and his brother had talked during the first. The tension was palpable in the SUV. 

 The second was in Abdoun between the Syrian and U.S. Embassies (A point that was NOT lost on me). IT WAS GORGEOUS!!! I am not sure about Z's mom, but I damn near creamed my trousers. I was in love! Then I heard the price. 

    The down side about being MathBoy, can you guess what words I learned first? Numbers I love numbers in Arabic, they make sense 300 is three one hundreds. What I heard was one million three hundred thousand Jordanian Dinars.

 Can you say return trip to the cardiologist. I grew up poor, sleeping in triple decker bunk beds at one point poor. That number in money made my head spin.     Z asked me what I thought. "It is so lovely, but it is so exp... mppph. I ALMOST got the word expensive out of my mouth when his mom's hand covered it.

He laughed and told me she was being subtle, warning me, "It is not for you to worry about the price." I told him I didn't want him working so hard for a home that he could not be there to enjoy it. Mom approved of the sentiment with a pat on the back.

 The tension from the SUV was gone. We wandered into the walled private courtyard to look at the garden and pool. The boys found a soccer ball and started screwing around. It was time to go, I leaned against the stacked stone wall to let the parents pass. When I turned to follow, OB shouted for me not to move. 

 Funny thing about being told not to move. It becomes so hard not to do the, GET THE HELL OFF ME DANCE! OB grabbed the eight legged, venom tailed, creature spawn from hell throwing it to the ground and crushing it. Oh yes, OB got a hug! During which he apologized to me. Zahir quickly took his place and I asked (HALF) jokingly, "Why is your country trying to kill me?" 

 I was checked for punctures, it didn't get the chance. Z's mom came running with the EpiPen from her purse. It was funny watching as her boys tried telling her it was not needed. The estate agent apologized profusely stating the landscaping had just been put in, "These things happen in new properties."

 I apologized in the car to Zahir's mom. "Apartments have less maintenance Chase." Z was dropped off back at the office and the rest of us went to the Apartment. OB again apologized for our talk. I thanked him again for the save. 

 There are about ten million people in Jordan. What are the odds that one of them would have three separate encounters with scorpions at two separate locations, over two months. The mind boggles. 


   -Chase